This is my 4th year celebrating Valentine's Day alone.
Basically, my 4th year of being single and embracing it each day.
But this year felt a bit different,
maybe it is because I am coincidentally sick at this lovely day.
And it is at this moment, I felt the urge to call someone.
Someone who hasn't exist yet.
I felt the urge to meet with someone,
the urge to go out and laugh out loud with someone,
the urge to finally come back to a place and meet with someone,
someone who would make my day brighter,
and the urge to meet someone who could make me feel better.
But when I thought about it,
just the thought of it,
there is an immediate mental block.
Something is blocking my heart,
something is blocking my enthusiasm,
something is blocking my vision,
something is blocking me from advancing to the next step.
Nevertheless what it is,
It is still Valentine's Day,
and here wishing all the couples a happy lovely day and may you cherish each other till the end.
And to the singles like me,
You will find someone.
Now, it's your turn to tell me that.
Jenny~
Updates!
January has been a really hectic month..
And with workloads to handle,
life became a bit hectic.
Being a class teacher for a bunch of kids whom I love the most,
Being the head of the English Department for my passion to the language as well as the teaching and learning process in the language,
Being the head of Tunas Puteri and English Club as it was said I can take up the job,
Being the assistant to the Program Kecemerlangan in Bahasa Inggeris aka assisting the head in training kids in English competitions,
and last but not least, being a teacher who spreads knowledge to the kids whom deserved it,
is not at all easy.
I guess it is true that this year, opportunities do appear in career,
and I get to learn a lot of new things,
as well as experiencing new feelings and excitement in my career.
Now, moving on to relationship.
It is said that singles like me would be able to build a relationship this year,
and I wonder,
how true is that?
Well, timing is everything.
Guess that's the short updates for this month!
Can't wait for CNY and head back home!
xoxo
Jenny~
Being on the train for quite some time,
Even though it is boring but at times, interesting people do appear.
A lady came to her carriage the other day,
At first, she gave out this really high-class aura.
And no one really likes her,
I guess people were intimidated by her.
And she reach to the place where she saw her, sitting all alone.
She came over and asked her if there is any place for her to sit,
And then, something happened.
From a stranger, she became the person to remind her that,
that everyone is like her, sitting all alone in her own place.
The lonely girl said, maybe its because she is bad and that, no one wants her,
and the lady told her, God there for everyone regardless if you are an angel or not.
God works in the most mysterious ways,
and even if He seems like He doesnt listen, He does.
Just put your heart in Him and things will work in His accordance.
Listening to such a soothing advice wrecks her heart,
making her finally break down.
The old lady then wishes the lonely girl and told her that she will always keep her in her prayers,
and left.
There are times when we started to lose hope,
hope appears.
There are times when we think nothing will happen,
things happen.
xoxo
Jenny~
Even though it is boring but at times, interesting people do appear.
A lady came to her carriage the other day,
At first, she gave out this really high-class aura.
And no one really likes her,
I guess people were intimidated by her.
And she reach to the place where she saw her, sitting all alone.
She came over and asked her if there is any place for her to sit,
And then, something happened.
From a stranger, she became the person to remind her that,
that everyone is like her, sitting all alone in her own place.
The lonely girl said, maybe its because she is bad and that, no one wants her,
and the lady told her, God there for everyone regardless if you are an angel or not.
God works in the most mysterious ways,
and even if He seems like He doesnt listen, He does.
Just put your heart in Him and things will work in His accordance.
Listening to such a soothing advice wrecks her heart,
making her finally break down.
The old lady then wishes the lonely girl and told her that she will always keep her in her prayers,
and left.
There are times when we started to lose hope,
hope appears.
There are times when we think nothing will happen,
things happen.
xoxo
Jenny~
The first thing that always come to my head when I couldn't get what I want is,
am I not trying hard?
Is it because of the new year or
is it because people around me are progressing to the stage that I am not moving,
or
is it because I do not try harder?
Sitting at the train carriage for quite some time,
looking at passengers that got off this train,
seeing their faces lit up when getting off the train,
seeing them embark on another new journey together with someone else,
makes me feel,
how long must I continue on this journey?
Is it time to change a carriage?
Or is it time to get off this train carriage and embark on another new adventure
alone?
They say, the more you wait, the better you will get.
They say, the best thing is worth the wait.
They say, go with the flow. There are things that we can't force.
They say, one day you will be happy too.
They say, he is out there.
But can you tell me?
The more I wait, will I get better?
Is the best thing really worth the wait?
Do I still have to go with a flow that seems to not be flowing.
Is he really out there?
Or am I not trying hard enough?
Or have I started to give up?
Should I get off now, or should I stay?
xoxo
Jenny~
am I not trying hard?
Is it because of the new year or
is it because people around me are progressing to the stage that I am not moving,
or
is it because I do not try harder?
Sitting at the train carriage for quite some time,
looking at passengers that got off this train,
seeing their faces lit up when getting off the train,
seeing them embark on another new journey together with someone else,
makes me feel,
how long must I continue on this journey?
Is it time to change a carriage?
Or is it time to get off this train carriage and embark on another new adventure
alone?
They say, the more you wait, the better you will get.
They say, the best thing is worth the wait.
They say, go with the flow. There are things that we can't force.
They say, one day you will be happy too.
They say, he is out there.
But can you tell me?
The more I wait, will I get better?
Is the best thing really worth the wait?
Do I still have to go with a flow that seems to not be flowing.
Is he really out there?
Or am I not trying hard enough?
Or have I started to give up?
Should I get off now, or should I stay?
xoxo
Jenny~
Almost a week after the New Year,
and all I am experiencing is gush of workloads!
Career took off well and starting to become hectic day by day.
With so many things to do, deadlines to beat, preparations to make, class decorations to be done,
it simply make me felt really tired.
But somehow, I loved it.
Though it is tiring but the sweat is adequate of jogging in the afternoon,
therefore losing weight is indeed in the process!
Well, the title of this post is feelingless.
All this while, when I dream, its either about job or with some guys that I don't know at all.
But this time, it was with a guy that I do know.
But the weird thing is, I didnt had any feelings.
I dont wake up feeling happy or excited.
And I didnt felt nice after dreaming it.
I guess its the pressure from family,
or maybe it was about something that we talked about,
but the feeling of being with a man you dont have feelings for,
the feeling of a man you dont have feelings for holding your hands,
and even though it was only a dream,
it feels uncomfortable.
Sometimes I wonder, since when did I become so feelingless?
xoxo
Jenny~
and all I am experiencing is gush of workloads!
Career took off well and starting to become hectic day by day.
With so many things to do, deadlines to beat, preparations to make, class decorations to be done,
it simply make me felt really tired.
But somehow, I loved it.
Though it is tiring but the sweat is adequate of jogging in the afternoon,
therefore losing weight is indeed in the process!
Well, the title of this post is feelingless.
All this while, when I dream, its either about job or with some guys that I don't know at all.
But this time, it was with a guy that I do know.
But the weird thing is, I didnt had any feelings.
I dont wake up feeling happy or excited.
And I didnt felt nice after dreaming it.
I guess its the pressure from family,
or maybe it was about something that we talked about,
but the feeling of being with a man you dont have feelings for,
the feeling of a man you dont have feelings for holding your hands,
and even though it was only a dream,
it feels uncomfortable.
Sometimes I wonder, since when did I become so feelingless?
xoxo
Jenny~
1 January 2016.
A new year and officially, one year older.
Today's post is basically to recap on the previous year's resolutions and setting up new and improved ones.
So, 2015 resolutions are:
1. Work hard, find ways to upgrade myself in terms of career.
Outcome = Yes, i did work my ass off and am still upgrading myself everyday in my career. Still learning new things and gaining ideas to incorporate in my teaching process.
2. Enjoy hard, find ways to enjoy this life in cheaper options.
Outcome - does waffles and ice creams considered? Well, reflecting on the whole year, I hardly had the time and energy as well as the company to enjoy hard. The only time I enjoyed was stuffing myself with chocolate waffles or ice creams or sleep through the afternoon or weekends. Pathetic? Try to be in my shoes.
3. Spoil hard, find ways to spoil myself at least once in four months in order to show appreciation to myself.
Outcome - I didnt do it. I didnt go spoil myself and I didnt appreciate myself. Reflecting to 2015, I didnt really buy myself good shirts or shoes or anything to reward myself. This is sad.
4. Last but not least, love. Love people around me and try to appreciate them in everything they do for me.
Outcome - Yes, I love everyone around me especially my colleagues who were tremendously helpful in helping me to get along and not stumble. And I did my best to appreciate them even though with a simple smile and "thank you." But, I haven't met anyone worthy enough to be my "the one".
And thus is the reflection of me in 2015. Therefore, I made another new list of resolutions which would be almost the same with the previous ones as I dont really hit the goals I set. So, here it goes:
1. Work hard in my career and learn whenever I am given the chance to do so.
2. Enjoy when I have time with the littlest efforts or in cheapest manner.
3. Sign up for zumba classes and get some sweats off during the weekends.
4. And last but not least, love. Try opening up myself and give myself a chance to meet others.
And that's it. Updates will be coming soon and to all, have a blessed New Year.
xoxo
Jenny~
A new year and officially, one year older.
Today's post is basically to recap on the previous year's resolutions and setting up new and improved ones.
So, 2015 resolutions are:
1. Work hard, find ways to upgrade myself in terms of career.
Outcome = Yes, i did work my ass off and am still upgrading myself everyday in my career. Still learning new things and gaining ideas to incorporate in my teaching process.
2. Enjoy hard, find ways to enjoy this life in cheaper options.
Outcome - does waffles and ice creams considered? Well, reflecting on the whole year, I hardly had the time and energy as well as the company to enjoy hard. The only time I enjoyed was stuffing myself with chocolate waffles or ice creams or sleep through the afternoon or weekends. Pathetic? Try to be in my shoes.
3. Spoil hard, find ways to spoil myself at least once in four months in order to show appreciation to myself.
Outcome - I didnt do it. I didnt go spoil myself and I didnt appreciate myself. Reflecting to 2015, I didnt really buy myself good shirts or shoes or anything to reward myself. This is sad.
4. Last but not least, love. Love people around me and try to appreciate them in everything they do for me.
Outcome - Yes, I love everyone around me especially my colleagues who were tremendously helpful in helping me to get along and not stumble. And I did my best to appreciate them even though with a simple smile and "thank you." But, I haven't met anyone worthy enough to be my "the one".
And thus is the reflection of me in 2015. Therefore, I made another new list of resolutions which would be almost the same with the previous ones as I dont really hit the goals I set. So, here it goes:
1. Work hard in my career and learn whenever I am given the chance to do so.
2. Enjoy when I have time with the littlest efforts or in cheapest manner.
3. Sign up for zumba classes and get some sweats off during the weekends.
4. And last but not least, love. Try opening up myself and give myself a chance to meet others.
And that's it. Updates will be coming soon and to all, have a blessed New Year.
xoxo
Jenny~
Without knowing it, today is the last day of 2015.
Time really do passes fast,
and without knowing it, I have been a teacher for almost a year.
It just felt as if I have just finished my studies instead of working.
And as usual, I will share with all what I have learnt from all the experiences that I have gained during this whole year.
1. Patience and prayers.
I believe in the power of prayers. And from continuous prayers, we would be able to achieve what we prayed for. If we didnt achieve it, it means there would be something even greater that will be given to us by God. And one of my wish came true: getting posted in Miri.
2. Loneliness became a part of me.
Yes, getting posted in Miri was one of the wonderful things that happen to me. Not only am I near to my family but also being in a familiar place makes this happy girl even happier. But loneliness always there. Looking back at the whole year, I have been alone, doing things alone, shopping alone, eating alone and driving alone. People do ask me out but at late nights which is not my favourite time. But slowly, loneliness became a part of me. I started to get used to it and stopped complaining about it. I guess I have learnt to embrace it and fully make use of it.
3. Love.
Yes. Love. No. I dont have anyone to love yet. And I stopped asking for one which I believe I shouldn't do. I started to lose hope and stopped wishing for one. I became very tasteless when it comes to love. They say love come unexpected. So, I stopped expecting and let it comes to me when the time is near.
4. Always learn.
Yes. Being a teacher is so challenging but so fun! I learnt a lot not only from the process itself but from the kids as well. And the output was so satisfying that I yearn more of it. And this is something that I wish to continue doing in the following year.
And last but not least, I wanna say thank you to all who made my 2015 a wonderful year. I wanna say sorry too if I have ever hurt or might not realised that I did something wrong to all who I came across in this year.
New resolutions for next year will be out soon as well as checking through 2015 resolutions! Have fun people! Happy New Year 2016.
xoxo
Jenny~
Time really do passes fast,
and without knowing it, I have been a teacher for almost a year.
It just felt as if I have just finished my studies instead of working.
And as usual, I will share with all what I have learnt from all the experiences that I have gained during this whole year.
1. Patience and prayers.
I believe in the power of prayers. And from continuous prayers, we would be able to achieve what we prayed for. If we didnt achieve it, it means there would be something even greater that will be given to us by God. And one of my wish came true: getting posted in Miri.
2. Loneliness became a part of me.
Yes, getting posted in Miri was one of the wonderful things that happen to me. Not only am I near to my family but also being in a familiar place makes this happy girl even happier. But loneliness always there. Looking back at the whole year, I have been alone, doing things alone, shopping alone, eating alone and driving alone. People do ask me out but at late nights which is not my favourite time. But slowly, loneliness became a part of me. I started to get used to it and stopped complaining about it. I guess I have learnt to embrace it and fully make use of it.
3. Love.
Yes. Love. No. I dont have anyone to love yet. And I stopped asking for one which I believe I shouldn't do. I started to lose hope and stopped wishing for one. I became very tasteless when it comes to love. They say love come unexpected. So, I stopped expecting and let it comes to me when the time is near.
4. Always learn.
Yes. Being a teacher is so challenging but so fun! I learnt a lot not only from the process itself but from the kids as well. And the output was so satisfying that I yearn more of it. And this is something that I wish to continue doing in the following year.
And last but not least, I wanna say thank you to all who made my 2015 a wonderful year. I wanna say sorry too if I have ever hurt or might not realised that I did something wrong to all who I came across in this year.
New resolutions for next year will be out soon as well as checking through 2015 resolutions! Have fun people! Happy New Year 2016.
xoxo
Jenny~
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
- Follow Us on Twitter!
- "Join Us on Facebook!
- RSS
Contact