Where?

Where is the old you?

Where is the old you that puts marriage at the very first element in life?

Where is the you that always wants to be in love,

and always find yourself dreaming of wearing that white gown,

walking down the aisle to the man you have been wishing for,

and say the magical words, "I do"?

Where is the you that have always dreamed of having kids,

and having a blissful family?

and where is the you who have always been so open and happy,

when it comes to talking about wedding?

You have turned into someone that you have never imagined to be in your young life.

You have turned into someone who doesn't accept the idea of wedding as your happy ending,

You have turned into someone cold,

who thinks wedding is a waste of money.

You have turned into someone who can't stop working,

because work is the only way for you to escape from thinking.

You have turned into someone who only thinks of finding someone to go travel with,

and no longer trying to find someone to settle down.

You have turned into someone who doesn't dream of getting married anymore,

because deep inside, 

you know you have given hope in this superficial love.

You have already given up on that dream,

regardless of how people tell you to never give up.

You have already given up on the dream of meeting someone who you could love and love you back,

regardless of how people ask you to continue to search.

and you have given up on the idea of falling in love,

because right now, your heart is so broken,

that when you think you are mending it,

you aren't.

All you did is just to piece it up together,

and eventually breaking it again.

That's why you were so upset,

you were angry,

you were sad,

and you were crying,

when people talk about how they wouldn't meet their another half if they were in the same part of the journey with you.

Because you know you do not have that dream or wish anymore.

Jenny~