Fragile times

Last night, I was having the worst meltdown ever.
I didn't know what to do,
I didn't what I was reading,
and I didn't what I was really doing.

I was sitting in front of my laptop,
trying to read and start completing my tasks,
when my brain just jammed and I was stuck there.
And that's when I felt like giving up,
I felt like why am I forcing myself to do all this,
I don't have anyone to prove myself,
I don't even have anyone that I could turn to and tell them all my woes,

I used to have one,
I used to have someone who would tried his best to cheer me up,
and gave me all the support I needed,
I used to have someone who tried to make me smile despite how gloomy my day was,
and surprised me with sudden outings, movies or even dessert time.
And now, he's gone.
At that moment, I suddenly felt fragile.
Everything and everyone is changing,
and for that one moment, I hated changes.

I wanted the old times back.
As foolish as it is, I wanted to go back to that time when I used to have someone at my side.
And I cried.
I cried hard.
And that's when I realised that all I need to do to feel better,
is to just to open up and let it all out.
I have been holding it down for quite some time,
and it is nice to show that broken side once in a while.

Today, I felt better after sleeping in.
I felt much better after letting all out.
I felt much better after those fragile moments and got my mind cleared.
Be fragile once in a while,
you can't act strong all the time.

Jenny~