Exhausted

It has been an exhausting month for me.
April was supposed to be a month of bliss,
where I would be happily awaiting for my birthday,
and waiting for the next surprise that comes to me.

But I was so caught up with my work,
that I don't really feel the excitement of counting down the days to my birthday.
Endless works,
demands,
deadlines,
documents and files to be submitted to respective people,
endless training for competitions every afternoon,
and with meetings and weekend duties in school,
somehow makes me feel exhausted.

I am mentally and physically fatigued.
Despite how strong am I,
or how willing I am to continue to fight on my way,
these are the times when I just wish I wasn't a workaholic,
someone who doesn't seek for fame and glory,
and just do my part well in teaching.

But I can't do it.
I am pushing myself past my limits,
and this is the time when I really need to sit and just let out all my feelings.
It is exhausting to keep on working so hard,
and coming back to an empty shell,
with no one to talk about how bad my day went.
It is exhausting to keep working so hard,
when no one was supporting me from behind.

It is exhausting,
and I am exhausted.
Am I going to give up just like that?
I can't.
I have pushed myself halfway of this journey,
and whatever it is, I need to keep pushing myself on.

Jenny~