Conversation with mom.

I am the type of person who would call my mom every night just to have a short conversation with her.

Usually, we would just ask one another what we were doing and what we had for dinner and stuffs,

and of course, the normal lecture of eating unhealthy food and less vegetables.

But after moving in to a new place with my brother, I realised that I complained less about my health,

I also felt much happier these days,

with less worries and anxiety except for those which were caused by my immense workloads and assignments.

So, tonight, as usual, I had the normal conversation with mom,

when I told her how time flies so fast,

and we are almost reaching the end of 2019 and towards 2020 in a couple of months,

and that's when my mom struck me with the statement that I wish she would not say,

"And yet, you are still single."

I didn't argue with her nor did I replied the statement,

and I immediately changed topic to avoid venturing deep into that.

Honestly, I have reached the age where finding the one seems to not matter so much already,

where I don't believe in love at first sight nor love is somewhere there at the corner waiting for me to discover him.

I have reached the age where most of my friends are either married or having kids.

The moments of desperation as well as hoping so much to be in love and end up like them seems to not work like it used to be already.

Right now, I felt really happy with what is happening.

Less drama, less waiting, less anxiety and less heartbreaks.

Don't get me wrong, 

it's not that I do not want to fall in love anymore,

I still hold on to my principle of wanting to get married by giving myself a break for 3 years after Masters.

I still do want to walk down the aisle and have a happy family with the man who would love me and respect my decisions in my career.

I still would want to look into the eyes of the man who would always look out for me and support my decisions even though it might be the craziest thing to do.

And I still would want to be with the man who prioritizes me while not forgetting to live as well.

And I still want to love the man who loves me and make me feel safe, knowing that I am the one he needed all this while.

I still do.

It's just that I am letting things to happen at its very own course,

while enjoying whatever is happening now.

Jenny~