Today is 31st December 2014,
A
date that signify the end of a good year, 2014,
That
also signify a new beginning for me into a new life, new routine, new people,
and maybe new feelings after all.
Throughout
the year 2014, I went through a lot.
The
good and bitter memories,
Building
and breaking of strings,
Remembering
and forgetting memories,
Meeting
and avoiding certain people,
I
went through turbulences of four major things, Experience. Memories. People.
Feelings.
Experience
-
Being in a campus
for five and a half years, experience is the most valuable thing that I have
gained. Able to learn new things, new skills, and to identify the most valuable
potential that I have is something that I experienced in 2014. Able to look
into me and my needs plus wants also help me to keep experiencing things and
learn from them. These experiences brought me up and change me, my perspectives
and my views about almost everything.
Memories
-
Memories. They
never left actually. The laughter I had with my friends, my rumet and with
people I hung out were the best memories. The tears I had all alone under my
blankets were also the bitter memories that I still remember. The fluttering feelings of seeing a good
looking guys and the teases that arose from my friends still makes me feel
fluttery and smiling. But the breaking feelings of seeing someone once so close
now became a stranger also still breaks and left me wondering, where was that
person I knew been? Meeting new people and became close makes me smile. But
avoiding them when they became a stranger sometimes breaks me. But everything
is what I call memories, where I can never dwell in it. Only for the sake of
reminiscing it is already enough.
People
-
People. The good
one. The bad ones. The funny ones. The pretending ones. The strong ones. The
good but bad ones. The bad but good ones. And the ones I fall in and out. These
people decorated my life in campus. And in 2014, I was friends with these
people. But I realised, caring about these people doesn’t make me a saint.
Doesn’t make me happy. But only create negative me when I don’t get the same
thing in return. And thus, a new me was reborn. The one who protects herself a
lot. The one who still could smile despite not having anyone beside her. The
one who could walk alone in life. The one who still care but not getting the
same things in return no longer hurt. That’s the one I am now slowly turning
into.
Feelings
-
Feelings.
Particularly love? Yes, 2014 was filled with love. Love to my friends, the
church, and family. How bout particular one person? Yes, I do in 2014. Ending
was? The train left without me knowing and I didn’t get to buy the entrance
ticket. I guess I have to wait for another train at another station next year.
Do I regret? I don’t. If I have bought the entrance ticket and head towards the
train, I might get into another accident in which I don’t know if I still could
walk after that. But what if taking the train would be my happy ending? It will
never be a happy ending. Don’t ask me how I know. I just know.
To end this post, I wanna say Goodbye to my campus in
Keningau. You have given me the most wonderful experiences, as well as the
worst memories. But after all, you will always be remembered. And I will be
back there, but this time, as an ex-student and as a visitor. Last but not
least, I shall end this post by officially closing the chapters in 2014, and
preparing myself for another fresh post in 2015.
Happy
New Year 2015! Signing off from 2014,
Jenny~
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