Challenges.

Challenges. 
Present almost everywhere.
From making decisions at my workplace into making decisions in the kitchen.
Everything pose a challenge to me.
Working has never been easy.
Love life has never been as easy as a pie.
And making decisions even at the slightest things are never my expertise.

Working has been fun with supportive teachers,
but tiring at times.
Everyone is lamenting on how tired they are,
or how wicked some teachers or clerks are to them,
or the workloads.
And yes, I experience the same stuffs going on.
But at the end of the day, it is how we think.
If we think that it is stressful or tiring, even going into your class would be stressful and tiring.
Easier said than done?
Well, I am trying to do it every single day.
I am not saying I am good in it, but at least I am trying.
So, why don't each one of us try?
Let's try to complain less and eventually stop complaining.
This applies to me as well, and reminding myself to do so.

Love life.
Nothing.
Zero.
I felt nothing.
No particular attractions.
No particular excitement and "shaking hands" phenomenon.
No electrical feelings going through.
Nothing.
And the question to myself is,
Am I getting back into the cold shells?
Or maybe I have not met the one who could melt me away every single time?

Now, I need an ice-cream.
To melt away all the negative and emo-ness in me.
So, bring me an ice-cream.

Jenny~

current situation

Finally, little time to sit here and blog.
I guess some might have clearly known how hectic it is teaching in urban school right?
I felt like practicum all over again.
the staying-back, painting, murals,
reminded me the old times.
But, I guess I am getting used to the title as a "teacher".
Everything I did, 
I felt like it should be done to help the school to progress.
And because of that, I became the mastermind for most of my school's project.
It is really tiring,
but it is worth it.

The last-time me looks things in short waves,
All I can do is lament and complain on why should I be the one doing this,
and eventually piled up all the works on myself.
But the now-time me looks things differently,
I started to see the long period of time,
I started to imagine how this school could one day excel with me in the picture.
I guess I started to aim for something different.
Glory is what I aim for.
But to achieve it,
sacrifice is something that must be done.

And I hope, the sacrifice that I will be doing will lead me to something even better,
and not lead me to an old, lonely life at the end (hahahah!)
Oh well, hectic schedules that caused me to be back at 4pm almost everyday is a challenge for me to go out and meet people.
But things will change.
I know it will.
Coz He will show me when the time comes.
I know He will. 

Jenny~

23

Seriously, work has taken up a lot of my time, 
and arriving back home at 4pm almost everyday is killing my drives to even blog,
but nevertheless, yesterday 15.04.2015 was a big day for me.
A day when I grew one year older, one year wiser, one year mature and one year prettier(?).. hahaha...
There wasn't any grand celebrations, no cakes or surprises,
Just normal well-wishing from friends and teachers,
Went out for a normal dinner with siblings,
and that's it.

But as I grow older, the thought of a birthday celebration became simpler.
When I was in my "younger" age, I wanted surprises, presents, cakes and spend it with a lot of friends..
But right now, I prefer quiet dinner with my family and closest friends.
Surprises become less expected and I live fine without em. 
Presents are more to an optional where I prefer sincere thoughts and wishes than materials in which I can buy it using my own money.
And spending it with a lot of people become something I would like to avoid.
I guess I grew mature. in a good way of course.

Therefore, I would like to thank all,
for your kind and well wishes, 
I would say Amen to all the wishes that has been made, 
and may all of them do come true.
For remembering it without me having to remind everyone or thru Facebook notifications,
thank you for your sincerity.
For those who wished me on Facebook, Whatsapp or SMS,
thanx for taking that little time to do such a simple but meaningful thing for me.
And for the blog post (you know who you are.. hahaha..),
thank you. I nearly cried (but I didn't coz I laughed more).
It meant a lot to me. =)

23 is not a sign of being old.
It is a starting point for me to grow towards excellence and a better person.
#23 #letsdothis

Jenny~