Songs

I remembered reading a short post about how songs can remind us of our feelings.

They say, instead of taking pictures during our vacation or trips,

listen to one particular playlist or song will remind us of the memories created.

I doubted it at first,

but right now, I think it started to take its effect.

I remembered during my post-breakup moments,

I have been playing one song on repeat,

and now, when I listened back to the song,

it reminded me of how broken I was last time.

I remembered in the beginning of the year where I was really down,

where everything starting from my career to my friendship and relationship was off,

I was listening to the ost for a Korean drama repeatedly,

and everytime right now, 

listening back to those songs reminded me of how down I was at that moment,

where everyday, I would wrap myself in a blanket and drowned myself with tears.

And now, I started to avoid from listening to any songs during my bad times,

I dont want to etch a lasting memory of those sadness in a song,

instead I want to create happy memories with the songs that I listened.

Feelings as well as memories are also like songs,

sometimes when we think we have it all forgotten,

one little incident or event or even a song,

will bring back all those memories and feelings to the reality.

And it is really up to us to face it and move on,

or stay in it and drown ourselves.

Yes, it is indeed easier said than done,

but there are times when I am really down,

I would think to myself,

how long do I want to be in this condition?

Looking at how easily one can be gone,

it made me appreciate of my time and life.

And I shouldn't waste it by crying over things that I have no control in.

Stand back up, Jen.

You have ample of time ahead,

and you don't know when will it end.

Be strong, do what you can do now,

and be happy when you still can.

Jenny~

La Vie En Rose

Tonight,
she sat near to her window,
and watched as the clouds started to cover the sky,
and all the stars were engulfed by the dark clouds.

She sat there and pondered,
when she heard someone playing with her ukulele.
And the lady started to sing a song that was so familiar to her.
She started to hum the tune of it,
and wrapped in her blanket,
she started to imagine.

She imagined meeting the man of her dream,
and walking down the aisle with him,
hand in hand with her white gown,
and a bouquet of fresh roses.
She will look amazing,
and while smiling,
she will look up to him,
and will tell him,
that she has never expected this day to finally come.

And on the wedding night,
the same tune will be played,
and that will be their first wedding dance.
As she slowly return back to reality,
she smiled to herself.
Though at times she felt like giving up,
and not wanting to continue to dream anymore,
there is some pieces of her who still hold on to this dream strong.

As the music started to slow down,
she placed her head on the table,
and started to hum again.

"La Vie En Rose"
Jenny.

Wish to skip.

People tell,

People say,

enjoy the current moment,

enjoy the current life,

because we never know where will the next moment will take us.

People tell,

people say,

enjoy the current company,

laugh the most with the people around us now,

because we never know where will they be in the next moment.

People tell, 

People say, 

live life to the fullest,

do what you want right now,

because we never know if we will still be given the same chance in the next moment.

But sometimes,

just sometimes,

I wish I have a fast forward button,

and fast forward this life,

just to see what could be my ending.

Would I be happily engaged or married with a man,

who is also my best friend,

and building up my own family?

Or would I be pursuing a higher level in my career,

and receiving recognition from the people above,

for my accomplishment in whatever I am doing?

Or am I still going to be stuck in this mundane routine,

teaching and going back home,

sitting in front of the laptop like right now,

writing and writing endlessly?

I wish I can see what is written for me in the future,

but knowing that I can't,

I choose to continuosly be patient,

and make the right choices.

Maybe the choices that I make will determine the true path for my future.

Listen,

See,

Choose,

Pray. 

Jenny~