broken.

fragile is da word..

once broken, considered broken,

when u thought u can mend it, u simply cant,

coz cracks are thr and no matter how u glue it,

thrs da visible lines of cracks right there...

such a perfect, beautiful sight,

should only be given to those who deserve it,

and someone who would take reli good care of it,

instead of breaking it and mending it again and again,

sometimes, when u break it,

thrs no turning back..

lucky tat chances are given to u each time u crack it,

and yet appreciate is somethin u nvr did,

and now u broke it,

leaving it shattered,

and worse, leaving to tat person to mend it herself,

do u feel da way she felt?

do u cry da way she cried?

but da most important question here is,

does urs break like hers too?

=ur simply a jerk=

Jenny~

september ends.

its da end of september d and october is like rushing in like da waves.. and of course when october comes, its all about preparations for test and exams.. and for sure, long long hols are waitin for me! excited for gols coz its time where gatherin wit family will be held, havin lotsa relaxations and peace at mind, and da best thing is no stress from studies.. hehe... but am kinda sad coz cant meet wit my buddies and da most important thing is i hav to stand not seeing him for a month and half... TOO LONG! (am gonna be missin him so so da so so muchie!)

anywayz, UAK is on 10th oct and den fully preparing for da finals.. well all i could hope is evrythin will go well for me and him esp on this finals.. and may our results achieved what we hoped for.. hehe.. and of course may da day pass slowly coz i still wanna be wit him before da hols.. hehe...

=i i love u=

Jenny~

there are times i dont understand myself..
i dont noe wat i want,
i don noe why i do certain stuffs,
and of course its like i dont recognise myself at times..

its like im afraid..
afraid of so many things...
afraid of upcomin exams n test,
afraid of being left alone,
afraid of being labeled as fussy,
afraid.

and i dont noe why am i this afraid..
and bcoz of this, i tend to do things tat i don noe y i did it..
i tend to make myself sad for no apparent reason..
i tend to think a lot..
and i tend to judge myself..

therefore,
this post is dedicated to those whom i accidentally hurt,
sorry, i didnt mean it..
didnt mean to get angry easily
didnt mean to cry easily..

=sigh, wats wrong wit me?=
Jenny~

smile.

Jenny~

sweet truth.

this is super true and yes, im experiencin it right now... i guess the reasons why He kept me single all this while is mayb because He believes that im not ready.. and now, i guess i am ready for commitments in bein a relationship and yeap, He reveals to me da one.. for those who are still single outside, juz wait and believe in God's plannings.. for those whose are in a relationship, appreciate him/her..

=best love story=
Jenny~

quiet.

thrs time when u feel like u hav to shut urself from da world and juz stay quiet for a while..
sometimes its best to keep quiet and enjoy some music,
at least it inspires u one way or another instead of interferin wit so many matters,
it juz make others feel sick and stressed out..

and mayb tats y i prefer to be quiet and wait for ppl's response instead of keep givin feedback (which flew across like wind).. and mayb tats y i chose to keep quiet today.. sometimes being quiet doesnt mean im angry or not in a mood.. its simply showin tat im tryin to ignore or care less a bit than usual.. and its tiring..

-all i need now is juz a place to be quiet and yet feel someone cares for me..-

Jenny~

piccas~~ =)

 -lyrics tat strike right into my heart-

-so, smile owes.. coz u wont noe whose gonna fall for ur smile at time when u smile- 

-beautiful memory- 

-true.. hehe..-

-posting pics wit quotes again today coz it seems like all these pictures juz reflect wat i tink and feel.. sometimes it feels reli good havin to find all these pics coz it juz deliver exactly wat u feel...-

=love=

Jenny~

list of works to be done...

list of works to be completed before da big day...

1. pameran literasi bahasa
2. Big fasa 2
3. GERKO (activity or competition)
4. Mdm VSS - assignment on methodology
5. UAK - 3 papers
 and ten of course, its holidays! haha... holidays for a week and then goin to:

FINAL EXAM!

and then final hols start for one and half months... hehe...
well, lotsa of things to stress on but am not gonna be stress first.. so, am gonna takin it easily.. =)

=hugs relieve=
Jenny~

love.

thanx for such a wonderful weekend and awesome surprises.. didnt expect all of those from u and this simply make me love u so so much.. happy 6 monthsarry! may God bless our r/ship and hope tat it'll stay like this for a long long time... love u so much!

=muackx=

Jenny~

=)

post of the day~

came across the website whr i always get these beautiful pics wit those beautiful words and decided to psot some here.. will be postin more on the next post.. reasons why i love to take these pics and post it in my blog coz thrs things tat we juz simply cant express thru words.. so let da pics do da describing.. hehe.. anywayz, the quotes tat i posted today is so much related to myself and how it affects me deep down.. and of course it simply bring back memories to me... =)

=memories bout us=
Jenny~

general sharin~

somethin tat i wanted to post after listening and putting lots of thoughts in it.. and no worries, its so not bout me.. juz a general sharing... and of course several questions shud be posed here... those who could answer, do answer it for me... coz im so blur on these matters and why does it hav to be complicated... 

1. u c relationship is like playing see-saw and it requires two ppl right to play it right... so when u wanna hold on to it and ask for chances, why the heck u dont do ur best to appreciate it and eventually start doin the right thing? i mean, i seriously despise those who dont appreciate...

2. ur good now and then ur bad... ur sweet now and then ur bitter.. tats juz wat i can use to define jerk... u noe its been ages since the word jerk actually appear, and thanc to u, its appearing again.. i mean i dont noe which part of u pisses me off the most but wat u did is so effingly describes to me a jerk... can u stop being on n off and start to "stabilize" urself instead?

3. last but not least, if u love then love wit ur heart... when u say those three words "i love u", then mean it instead of sayin it like its so common.. plz la, those words could heal and kill... so y dont u tink of it properly before sayin it out again? sometimes i pity those who actually trusted those words and eventually got betrayer bcoz of it.. and im sick of seeing ppl who says it out as if its like nothing.. if u say it then take action and prove it instead of sayin it but hurtin ppl at the end of the story...

mayb im still new in these relationship thingy compared to those who have fallen in and out of love for like thousands of time.. but hey, if u hav feelings then others do have feelings too.. if ur prone to pain, wat more others u hurt intentionally or not... i dont reli wanna label u as jerk but based on wat u did, wat can i say, ur under my label if jerk.. and i might hav to be hypocrite when facing u... so THANX... sheesh.. u hurt ppl and then sayin tat ur hurt... so big question here, y hurt ppl when u noe ur gonna hurt bcoz of it?

=written when im angry=

JEnny~

camwhoring

when webcam is good and we are bored.. haha...

 these are taken durin our SBE... haha...

well, this is of course before goin to eat last nite.. haha.. (sempat kan?)... hahaha

hehehe... and a pic of me before heading back to ip... gosh, i love takin pics esp when it strikes on the right lighting and the right mood.. haha.. 

=me likey=

Jenny~

mooncake

HAPPY MOONCAKE FESTIVAL!  though this year is similar to last year where am celebratin it wit a bunch of friends but am happy coz its still the friendly and fun atmosphere... i mean celebratin wit family is like way much better but since they are not here wit me, my buddies and him is the closest ppl i have... and its reli fun hanging out with them, talkin, laughin and sharin so many thing includin absurd ones... haha... i think im gonna miss this condition when i graduate... and somehow i don feel like graduatin so early.. coz this is the only time for me to share wit my frens, hang out together, sharing and most important listening to their stories.. i mean after graduating, we dont even know the chances to meet up wat more to say talk... and wit all the busyness and stress from work, i doubt about spendin time together like now...

so i guess, wat i shud say here is appreciate.. appreciate the time we have while spendin it wit our friends and loved ones, appreciate the moments we hav built together and most important, appreciate all the memories and gifts given by our friends and loved ones directly or indirectly... im appreciatin my moments and memories, how bout u?

=memories etched deep=

Jenny~

updates~~

woots2x.. ok, lets start updating... so im gonna divide it into like three updates coz so many things happen during these few days... hehe...

update 1:

starting from holidays... had a great time at home coz thrs like lotsa food at home waitin for me and had so much conversation wit mummy n daddy n oso my sis.. i mean my sis actually showed her mature side to me b givin me like a lot of love advices and stuffs like tat.. i mean it seems easier to share wit her stuffs these days compared to last time.. and da best thing is we are getting aling well and kinda fight like rarely... and of course we went to the palace of the Brunei's sultanate.. and indeed it was an eye opener... i mean da palaca was like so big even when we were juz in da hall itself.. haha.. and of course, da food served was like super awesome but da downside is we had to rush since da chance to shake hands wit Her Majesty was like so limited.. hehe...

update 2:

after the holidays, i has SBE or known as school based experience right away.. and of course, went to school and observe the teachers for coursework.. well, is pent most of my time eatin and listenin to songs and playing games bcoz thr wasnt anythin much to do... but after finishing it and gettin ready for lecture, laziness attackin me and im reli lazy to go for mdm k's test... ish3x... am waitin for weekends!

and of course, celebrated my dear's bday.. though it was reli simple and no suprises, but i hope he had a great time spenidn it wit me.. gave gifts to him also and i think sincerity matters the most.. not an expensive gift but somethin tat i made wit my heart.. haha... but i had a lot of fun and laugh a lot.. i love him a lot... =)

so, yeah... basically those are like some updates about me and will be updatin often when the line is ok.. hehe... 

=life is good=

Jenny~

back.

finally, back to ip.. well, of course when ur back, mixed feelings revolve around u... reasons are as follows:

1. sad coz left home and all da comfort at home.. and of course da love from both my parents..

2. anxious coz assignments are like waitin for me and that im reli lazy to get it done.. seriously!

3. angry and disappointed coz no water again.. and its like at da wrong timing again.. sheesh..

but out of all this, i feel reli happy being back here.. and all this is bcoz of him.. gosh, i miss him like so much during da hols and it feel good seeing him again.. hehe... and thanx for brightenin my darkest days o... hehe..

=ur like a star for me=

Jenny~