30.04.2013 - election?

so the title says it all..
today's post will be about election that is coming real soon which is in the weekend..
and yeah, im not eligible enough to vote since i just had my birthday this month..
so i was just thinking to myself,
why am i writing about election today?
i mean im not the person that is into politics and stuffs like that..
im not someone that even know what is politics and how to play the game..

but today's post is basically about what i think..
i guess election have to be clean, fair and just..
not being monopolized by anyone and giving everyone the rightful answers at the end of the elections..
to allow us, the citizens to choose wisely the one we want to lead without having any discrimination or forceful feelings..
when i was small, i remembered that there were not much issues when elections were around the corner,
i mean no violence and shootout here and there unlike today..
it seems like my country isnt as peaceful like last time..
politicians debate with one another healthily and doesnt touches sensitive issues..
but now, it is so different..
so many tactics, unknown motives, plans, promises and so many strategies can be seen used before the elections just to ensure that the citizens would choose them..
and this made politics look so scary in the eyes of a young girl like me..
i even wonder how do politicians could sleep at night with all the violence and issues here and there... (sigh)

well, for those who will be voting, vote the one you think and feel is right..
vote using your head and not your heart..
like what Father said in his homily last Sunday, open your eyes wide, think, reflect of what had been given and happened from the past till now and then respond..
dont get tempted with sweet promises that who knows might not be fulfilled..
i guess that's all about politics for me..
Happy Voting to those who are going to vote on May 5 and may the one we choose is the one we really want and deserves our vote..
And do what you think is right, and always ready to bear the consequences and responsibilities for your vote.. =)

Jenny~

29.04.2013

found this picture when i was clearing out my recycle bin..
and yes, it is true... =)

Jenny~

28.04.2013

sometimes i wish im at home..
coz home is the only place that i could feel truly happy..
coz home is the only place where i wont think so much..
coz home is the only place that i wouldnt see what i dont wish to see..
coz home is the place where i wont get hurt...

mode: need home.
Jenny~

26.04.2013

today marks the end of my practicum phase 1..
and the beginning of hectic schedules and exams...
during this practicum, i have seen, heard and experienced so much..
and everything makes me realise that being a teacher is never an easy job..
to be a dedicated one especially...

for those who really thinks that being a teacher is an easy task to do,
try being in our state and look from our point of view..
and then u will realise how great a teacher sacrifices for their pupils' future..
and that implies to the dedicated ones especially..

pictures will be up after i got everything from my friend,
but now i hope that from what i have learned in this phase, will help me in the next practicum..
may every knowledge and experiences that i have gained this month, will make me a better teacher in the future...

Jenny~

25.04.2013

my post are very related to what i am doing at the current moment..

and whenever i write some emo post, i am sure to be listening to songs that could make me feel that way..

and lucky (unlucky) you, yes i am gonna write another entry which i think reflects of my current feeling..

do you know sometimes not knowing anything actually makes u feel better?

though knowing it would severely break you and help u to get up and become someone one better?

sometimes i wish i wouldnt hear or see anything that will break me into pieces again and again..

and yes, i havent gone thru that and i wish i wouldnt go through that..

do you know sometimes even when i say i have taken another step ahead,

i will sometimes look back once in a while..

and because of that, i try to learn to shut myself out from all those memories..

close my eyes when things that resembles my memories appear..

close my ears when all the sweet stuffs said resembles what i used to say and hear during those moments..

close my mind so i wont think of those memories again..

and of course shut my heart, so i wont be able to feel those feelings again and wont let anyone make me hurt..

sometimes u might wonder why do i say i like tat guy, or this guy or that guy is cute and handsome and is my taste?

do u really think i am ready to allow myself to fall for one right now?

i would tell u that everything is just an infatuation..

something that would not stick to my heart and mind..

coz everything are still in pieces and are still in the process of picking it up and sticking it one by one..

sometimes, i miss being in one,

but sometimes i prefer in this condition..

at least i know from now on, i wont get hurt anymore..

Jenny~

16.04.2013

as we are all well aware of (or maybe some dont), yesterday was my birthday..
and yes, am officially 21 now and somehow, am in the group of the early twenties..
yesterday, i didnt really celebrate but am touched with the little deeds done by my friends..
though only a slice of cake, or lots of cupcakes or even some simple-looking cakes,
everything means so much to me..
though i didnt receive any presents, but i received so much love and prayers from everyone who prayed for me and wished me..

thus, i wanna thank God for giving me another day to live in this world..
i wanna thank both my parents for their endless care and love to me, though sometimes they are not showed..
i wanna thank to all my friends no matter where you are, for your thoughts on me, your prayers and wishes...
i wanna thank to those who taught me the meaning of life, and though life hurts, life still has another tomorrow..
and last but not least, to those who gave me keychain, those who bought me cakes and cupcakes, those who gave me sweet cards, those who lefts sweet wishes on my facebook, those who spent time with me and made me feel better without any intentions, and those who made me felt like cryin on my bday, those who made me laugh, and those who reminds me of the past, thanx for everything.. you meant the world to me.. May God bless you guys too with abundance of love and happiness.. =)

Jenny~

14.04.2013

though i am super bz with practicum and stuffs like that,
and yes, tomorrow is gonna be another war with those little monkeys,
but still, i wanna post before my big day tomorrow..
tomorrow will be da day for me to enter the big no 21~~

so yeah, may this new age brings me a lot of happiness and makes my wishes come true.
and may this new life brings me lots of good surprises and makes me even more grown-up than now..

tomorrow will be updating on my big day..
as well as all the messages that a big 21 year old lady would prepares for everyone reading this blog all this while..
and may God always bless me no matter where i am and always be with my parents who have been raising me until this big age, and until im old.. hehehe.... =)

Jenny~

12.04.2013

when u thought u are already strong enough to look at the past and laugh about it,
you simply are not.
when you thought you are ready to open back those memories,
you simply are not.
when you thought everything has been mended and is recovering,
you are wrong.

and yes, i am wrong..

Jenny~

11.04.2013

well, tonite's post will be something off practicum a bit..

i mean everyone would be either complaining on how well their pupils and stuffs like that,

or everyone would be complaining the workloads during practicum or how poor the pupils progress and stuffs like that which i normally do oso..

so today, lets just give practicum a break and let's talk about some other stuffs..

so for those out there who currently knows my status, good for you..

and certain questions were like asked to me and yeah, da answer is maybe no...

somehow, i couldnt bring myself forward to say those words anymore..

i guess i just locked it up already... too busy to sort the pieces and left it to mend by itself..

and then, today my friend talked to me how sometimes when we got used to something and that something is taken away, we felt different..

somehow, its true...

when somethin that we used to have, do, meet, talk and laugh about is taken away, there is always a piece that feels different...

so it struck back to me and how i tried to get used after all that had happened..

and indeed it took a while to get used to it...

sometimes i feel life is ironic...

the ones who said they wouldnt treat you the way someone else had treated u, somehow got around and did the same thing...

i guess, life's like that... 

gotta learn to stop believing in others and believe in myself only..

gotta learn to stop giving and start protecting myself..

gotta learn to be someone better in life especially relationship..

gotta learn to find someone who could give me 100% assurance, commitment and trust.. 

gotta be someone better than now..

Jenny~

10.04.2013

wow, it seems like it have been quite some time i didnt update my blog right?
well, its been a busy and tiring week with all the staying-up routines doing lesson planning, completing weekly journal and this and that..
who says being a teacher is an easy job?
well, i have embraced this job and i would try my best to love my occupation..
and i do have my flaws here and there, but i hope i can fix it slowly..

anywayz, i went for public speaking competition representing my campus and indirectly representing my state, Sarawak to this national level..
and it was organised by the Girl Guides' Association..
and i am proud to say that i got the second place in this big national competition...
it was an amazing feeling and till now, i cant forget how i felt the moment my name was being called out..
it feels like i was in a beauty contest..
but, the experience and knowledge was good..
i love how i can gain co much knowledge in this competition and all the compliments on my speaking skills especially on how i used English... it just build up my confidence more and more..
and suddenly, i felt happy that i was raised in Brunei during my early years and met with all the wonderful English teachers who have brought me up in that kind of society and make me love this language..

nevertheless, now i myself is gonna be an English teacher and i hope i can be like them too, inspiring the young ones to speak in English confidently and one day, achieve success in whatever they are doing.. though the road seems windy, hard and thorny, but if we have the enthusiasm to do it, i am sure we will reach the smooth part of the road sooner or later..

Jenny~

4.04.2013

wow, i never thought that it has been four days not updating this blog..
i guess the practicum have took most of my time away..
and da only time when im free to update my blog is when i have no class the next day or weekends..
anywayz, im having my practicum in SK. Kg. Baru, a school located quite far away from my hostel..
but luckily we had car-pooling so yeah, its much cheaper, i guess...

and i was given Year 2 which are full of little kids in a class..
but somehow, i love my pupils..
i mean they are not really naughty and though at times, they dont pay attention to me, i am able to grab their attentions back..
but the poor thing is that, they are not fluent in English and communication skills-wise is another problem..
i have to use English only on instructions but when i converse with them, i have to use BM or else they would not understand a word im saying..
and this is quite saddening..
i guess i have to find some ways to help me in their fluency in English..

actually, i love to teach..
i love when my pupils are able to learn something new and their faces brighten up..
but what makes me feel so tired inside and out is the workload especially paper works..
with so many things to write, lesson plans, daily reflections, weekly journals, updating folio, creating materials and resources as teaching aids..
all these are just too much for a person to handle at one time especially when i have to juggle with so many things..
i guess that's the challenge right?
well, i accept this challenge and ready to do my best in accomplishing my mission..

*wish me luck in KL competition tomorrow (for those who knows)
Jenny~ =)