I hAtE wAiTiNg!!

ok, Malaysians has this kind of attitude that seems like it can never be changed in their lifetime which is keepin ppl waitin... ok, maybe im a patient person as in i dont mind waitin but im a human too.. and my patience has its limits too... i dont mind waiting for a couple of minutes for my frens to get ready before we are out to town...

but the worst thing that actually tested my patience is when this Minister was late for an event yesterday... actually its da closing ceremony and everyone came early including me so that we can get seats (at least!) since thrs so many other students comin too.. according to da programme book, da event SHOULD HAVE started at 830am... i mean SHOULD HAVE!! so we waited from 830 am until 1000am... i was like wondering wat the heck is he doin until he was so late.. everyone was waitin for him, students, principals and da directors from other college... OMG!!!

he actually came LATE and gave his own SYOK SENDIRI speech since no one wanna listens to a late-comer and then officiate the event... i was like, "Wat kind of minister is this who comes so late to events and how is he gonna earn ppl's trust anymore? if im 21, im so not gonna vote for him!!!".... sheesh lah... dont keep referrin our culture to da Japanese or Korean people lah coz u urself cant even change ur damn habit.... keep telling us to be early for events and blah blah, and they themselves were late includin those VIPs bein invited..... OH GIMME A BREAK!! I noe im a future teacher and hav to be patient but hey, who can stand ppl tats late for important events?? i CANNOT O, u CAN meh?

Jenny~

Weird~

sometimes i think its weird when people misunderstand the way we treat someone... ok, lets give an example.. I hav a fren who loves makin frens wit guys... she seems to have da chemistry wit guys and she's not flirting wit em ok.. juz tat she is more comfy wit da guys bt she's still ok wit us...

so she owes afce da type of problem when she treats someone reli nice, da guys will eventually thought she likes them or they start to develop feelings to her... and bcoz of this, she sometimes has to sacrifice her friendship with them... for her, its a loss bcoz they are reli good guys but due to avoid further misunderstanding as well as clashes with her boyfriend, she has to let go...

so to my readers, i wanna ask; why do guys owes think so much? i mean last time its da girls who thinks a lot and wonders if that guy likes her or not, and stuffs like that... but rite now, its like opposite.. guys think so much and then when they misunderstood the way the girls treat them, they will either avoid them or develop feelings to them too... which is why, im wondering right now.... WHY CANT GUYS AND GIRLS BE JUZ BEST FRIENDS AND THAT'S IT?

i mean its true that there are guys and girls becomin good friends but for me, i see a few cases oni... hmm~ well, i guess this is a question that will never hav any answer after all..

Jenny~

9 deadly words from girls.. =took from facebook=

1) Fine
This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

2) Five Minutes
If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

3) Nothing
This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

4) Go Ahead
This is a dare, not permission. Don’t Do It!

5) Loud Sigh
This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)

6) That’s Okay
This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That’s okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

7) Thanks
A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you’re welcome. (I want to add in a clause here – This is true, unless she says ‘Thanks a lot’ – that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say ‘you’re welcome’ . that will bring on a ‘whatever’).

8 ) Whatever
Is a woman’s way of saying F– YOU!

9) Don’t worry about it, I got it
Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking ‘What’s wrong?’ For the woman’s response refer to #3.

Jenny~

I hav limits too!!

i am a huma, and i will get angry or pissed off too... i have feelings too and i need ppl's attentions too... i have the days when i am moody and do not smile too.. i mean you guys do have those days when ur feeling blue and prefer to be quiet and dont speak right?

i might look mature but inside i have my time when i am childish... but why cant u accept that side of me... why do i always get negative feedback when i speak... why isit when u guys nid help, u guys will come and find me, but when i need ur help, ur somewhere else... why? why? why?

im not mad, im not angry, in juz disappointed.. i have my own limits too... i need ur attention too... what will u react if u found out that u and ur frens left u when u say u will follow them out? what will u react when ur frens saw u and act innocent as if like its ur fault and not them?

im juz tired and bcoz these things happen when im havin period, i get reli sensitive on these kind of matters... I JUZ DONT WANT TO BE ANOTHER PILLOW~~ =(

jenny~

My bday~

I had my bday on 15th april and im kinda happy wit it... finally im 18 already and experienced the stage whr ppl start to say that im legal... haha.. ok, legal as in many factors ok... i cant say anythin about me being legal but i know whr are my limits, thanx to my friends and family... anywayz, i had a "great" shower which is luckily comprising of flour and water only... i was being tricked and thought my friend who had sprained her ankle fell in the toilet.... but then it turned out that they were already prepared to splash me.. consequently my phone got into some problem but luckily it was fixed by my technician aka mastermind of the plan.. haha.. thank you ah... haha..

then i received sweet messages via text message and from fb... especially to michael wong aka ah yew, u owe me an unforgettable dinner o... haha.. i cried on the eve before my bday because i missed my home, family and friends.. i mean this is my very first time celebrating without my family besides me but eventually im able to pull thru it.. we had cake at the night of my bday which is dedicated to all those wh had their bday early of the yr... had fun but i was hoping more though... anywayz, i made a deal with my family that we're gonna have a great dinner when im back.. haha..

Moody~

Im not feeling well emotionally.. maybe its due to the hectic schedule that i have to go thru these few days plus there is not even anough time to take a rest.. especially on tuesdays... the schedule is like this:

1. study from 720am to 1250pm
2. then practice drama from 145pm to 330pm
3. then GERKO at 4pm to 6pm
4. and last but not least,730 pm to 830pm BIG..

Gosh, can u see the schedule.. its like i can actually rest and relax by the end of BIG.. its exhausting ok... and then tomolo i thought of going out and get some money since now i realised that im not avin enuf money to survive the week, i think... but then thrs talks again and i dont even know if my friends are willing to accompany me out when the talk ended so late... why must the talk held tomolo? sheesh!!! anywayz, i hope im able to survive today... at least by not snapping at ppl... haiz~~

Jenny~

My sweet memories~~

I went through my pendrive few days ago and found some pictures... my graduation pictures with my friends at that time... we were so happy and i missed them a lot.. these are only a few of the pictures,... well, its enuf to make me smile and bring back all the fun and crazy moments we had together.. i miss u guys and love ya owes... =)

Jenny~

10 Reasons for Hope~

1. God is truly in control.

If God is God, then nothing happens apart from His knowledge and permission.

While it is difficult to imagine why God allows some painful things to happen, His character, revealed in the Bible and through the testing of generations, leads us to the conclusion that He is willing and able to sustain you during the worst of times.

We were crushed and completely overwhelmed, and we thought we would never live through it. In fact, we expected to die. But as a result, we learned not to rely on ourselves, but on God who can raise the dead. (2 Corinthians 1:8,9)

2. There is an eternal life to come.

Yet what we suffer now is nothing compared to the Glory He will give us later. (Romans 8:18)

He will keep you strong right up to the end, and He will keep you free from all blame on the great day when our Lord Jesus Christ returns. (1 Corinthians 1:8)

3. The story isn't finished yet.

Time after time, the Bible records hopeless situations that ultimately ended in victory. Think of Job's sickness, Josephs betrayal by his brothers, David's adultery and the many who were healed in mind, body and spirit. But Joseph told them, don't be afraid of me. Am I God, to judge and punish you? As far as I am concerned, God turned into good what you meant for evil. He brought me to the high position I have today so I could save the lives of many people. (Genesis 50:19,20)

4. God has not given up on you!

Don't give up on Him. For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord. They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.(Jeremiah 29:11)

5. There is likely purpose in your pain.

Ask God to reveal His purpose in allowing this difficulty in your life. That's a legitimate question to ask. Often, the answer comes in the process of dealing with your circumstance.

Dear brothers and sisters, whenever trouble comes your way, let it be an opportunity for joy. For when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be strong in character and ready for anything. (James 1:2-4)

6. You are loved!

Even the most unlovable person in the world is actually loved so much by God, that He let His Son die a terrible death to restore their relationship. God does love you!

He sees your pain and weeps with you. He has sent Me to comfort the brokenhearted and to announce that captives will be released and prisoners will be freed. ... To all who mourn in Israel, He will give beauty for ashes, joy instead of mourning, praise instead of despair. For the Lord has planted them like strong and graceful oaks for His own glory. (Isaiah 61:1-3)

7. Your prayers are heard.

You parents if your children ask you for loaf of bread, do you give them a stone instead? Or if they ask for a fish, do you give them a snake? Of course not! If you sinful people know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give good gifts to those who ask Him? (Matthew 7:9,10)

8. You are not facing this alone.

For God has said, I will never fail you. I will never forsake you. That is why we can say with confidence, The Lord is my helper, so I will not be afraid. What can mere mortals do to me? (Hebrews 13:5,6)

9. Others have made it through you can too.

Try to connect with others who have gone through similar situations. You will find hope, strength and encouragement. A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken.

10. Reach out to someone else who is struggling.

Place your focus on someone else and invest your life in him or her. You may discover that your peace of mind is found in being a source of hope for another. All praise to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. He is the source of every mercy and the God who comforts us. He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others.

When others are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us. (2 Corinthians 1:3,4)

Decided to post this which was taken from a website because i think it is meaningful and able to inspire everybody who reads it.. So give it some thought... =)

Jenny~

Happens to a lot of ppl~

*in case u cant see what is written, da girl say, " be careful wit it.. its
fragile".. but when the guy broke it, he says "eh, its worthless anywayz..."*

it hurts~

few weeks ago, i supposed, i have start making little wishing stars for him.. i thought that it will make a great present as he WAS a nice friend to me... but the weird thing is, i should be happy and thinking bout him when im making it.. but im not.. i was sad, angry and disappointed at that time.. in my head, the painful event keep repeating in my head.. i wanna forget bout it and juz go on wit this friendship but i cant.. it hurts...

when u suddenly turn to me and say this, "u know, this is bad.. all my friends are here and they saw me wit you... oh no! im sure they will start saying stuffs bout me and u.. aiya, wat shud i do ah??"... when u say that, do u actually think bout how i feel? do you know its as if telling me that im not wanted to be seen beside u? and do u know how bad it feels? how i wish ur in my shoes and let u feel the pain.. or maybe u wont feel anything bcoz u dont take this friendship seriously.. u juz need a "pillow", i guess...

the night when u gave me a small token and say thank you for all the things i did, its like you're telling me ur cutting off all the ties wit me and doesnt wanna hav anything to do wit me anymore... u actually make me feel like i have been used, like a pillow.. when needed, u will come right to me but when u dont need, u juz cast me aside.. and bcoz of u, my tears fall again... from now onwards, i vow not to let my tears fall for any guy unless he's worth it...

and for my readers, u might be wondering why cant i get off wit this matter.. let me tell u why.. its bcoz i value my friendship wit this guy and i thought we could be best friends.. but when suddenly stuffs like this happen, its giving me insecurity to believe in guys anymore.. what more to say on love.. tats y im not letting myself to fall for anyone... i juz dont wanna get hurt each time i fall.. same goes to friendship.. it hurts seeing someone u thought were ur friend and cares for him, eventually knowing that he has dumped u when he get back on track wit his best friend... it hurts, thats all..

Jenny~

Him~

I never thought me and him could be friends from the start.. I thought we would only be merely collegemates and that's it.. but incidents always happens between both of us and eventually we became friends.. Close friends...

We exchange our numbers and from that day, we texted each other, met and even had dinner in da cafeteria together.. evrything seems so perfect and eventually i thought we could be really good friends in the end.. but the things that i wished for never really come true..

this yr, our friendship turned sour.. maybe its because of me... but its also because of his actions.. if you really want to be my friend and not thinking anything else, you wouldnt have to hide ur face from ur friends when the see us together.. i cant accept the explanation that u wanna run away from gossips... it juz doesnt make sense for me... i mean da one whose gonna be reli affected is me and not u.. besides, its u who says that u dont care wat ppl think but ur showing me da otherwise.... Gosh, ur so HYPOCRITE!!

hence, from that day onwards till now, we dont reli talked to each other, meet and eat together.. he has his own group of friends and same to me.. i am unable to accept someone whose a hypocrite and always find ways to avoid from controversies... but when ur with other girls, i dont c u acting that way.. but when ur wit me, ur showing me all the attitudes...

maybe im wrong too but sorry, if this friendship doesnt mean anything to u, then its better to let go before i get hurt even worse... thanx for da sweet memories.. and thank you for showing me the real you...

Jenny~

My results!!

My results for the mock exam that i have seated few weeks ago has arrived in my hand juz this afternoon... I received my results and guess what, its almost like what i have expected... I got 3 B+ and 1 C+.. ok, i got C in my Language Description aka on the grammar and stuffs like that... meanwhile, my literature, composition and social studies helped me to get 3 B's... haha...

I am satisfied with my results though i did not get any A's... I mean getting these kind of results when its my first time taking up this exam is simply awesome.. haha... but i am sure i am gonna work reli hard for my finals so that i can achieve the pointer that i have wanted so much... I juz wanna show my parents that though they are not at my side, i can still do well in my exams and to my aunts and uncles that i can be a good teacher some day...

Jenny~

I dont feel it..

When i see u, i dont feel like we are friends anymore.. wat happen to us? in virtual world, we are so close, but in reality, we're so far apart.... i guess that's the end..

Jenny~

April~

this is the mth of april and guess what, its gonna be 2 more months b4 goin back home.. cant wait for that... another thing is that, its approximately 10 more days b4 my 18th bday... guess what, im excited waitin for my bday but somehow, i felt kinda sad... i mean this is gonna be my first time celebratin my bday without my family members... i mean its ture that i have my friends here but the feelings will be different.

the only thing i am hoping for is that my bday will be able to go smoothly without any disturbing incidents. ok, movin on to what i have been doin right now.. we are havin practices on Macbeth, a short drama that will be presented on may 5th.. the drama is mainly focuses on murder and stuffs like that... and luckily im a narrator in the drama... meaning no nid to memorise scipts and still become the centre of attention...

so practices is like whenever we are free... and its kinda tiring but since its a part of our assignments, i dont reli mind about it... besides that, i have thought about the stuffs that have been goin on these few weeks and i have made my own decisions... sometimes its tiring to hold on and i guess im letting go slowly... things never turn out like how we want right... but still, i will never forget how happy we were last time... =)

Jenny~

Mommy~

By the time the Lord made mothers, He was into the sixth day working overtime. An Angel appeared and said "Why are you spending so much time on this one?"

And the Lord answered and said, "Have you read the spec sheet on her? She has to be completely washable, but not elastic; have 200 movable parts, all replaceable; run on black coffee and leftovers; have a lap that can hold three children at one time and that disappears when she stands up; have a kiss that can cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart; and have six pairs of hands."


The Angel was astounded at the requirements for this one. "Six pairs of hands! No way!" said the Angel.

The Lord replied, "Oh, it's not the hands that are the problem. It's the three pairs of eyes that mothers must have!"

"And that's on the standard model?" the Angel asked.

The Lord nodded in agreement, "Yep, one pair of eyes are to see through the closed door as she asks her children what they are doing even though she already knows. Another pair in the back of her head are to see what she needs to know even though no one thinks she can. And the third pair are here in the front of her head. They are for looking at an errant child and saying that she understands and loves him or her without even saying a single word."

The Angel tried to stop the Lord "This is too much work for one day. Wait until tomorrow to finish."

"But I can't!" The Lord protested, "I am so close to finishing this creation that is so close to my own heart. She already heals herself when she is sick AND can feed a family of six on a pound of hamburger and can get a nine year old to stand in the shower."

The Angel moved closer and touched the woman, "But you have made her so soft, Lord."

"She is soft," the Lord agreed, "but I have also made her tough. You have no idea what she can endure or accomplish."

"Will she be able to think?" asked the Angel.

The Lord replied, "Not only will she be able to think, she will be able to reason, and negotiate."

The Angel then noticed something and reached out and touched the woman's cheek. "Oops, it looks like You have a leak with this model. I told You that You were trying to put too much into this one."

"That's not a leak." the Lord objected. "That's a tear!"

"What's the tear for?" the Angel asked.

The Lord said, "The tear is her way of expressing her joy, her sorrow, her disappointment, her pain, her loneliness, her grief, and her pride."

The Angel was impressed. "You are a genius, Lord. You thought of everything for this one. You even created the tear!"

The Lord looked at the Angel and smiled and said, "I'm afraid you are wrong again. I created the woman, but she created the tear!"

~I love my mommy.. =)~

haha.. ok, im sure u guys know whose the F4 in Korea right... the really cute and handsome guys that always stick to one another in the porpular drama, Boys After Flower.. haha.. ok, in IPG Kampus Keningau, there is also so-called F4 in the TESL class where the differences are:

1. they are 4 girls.
2. they comes from different races and beliefs, including their family background.
3. they are nice, willing to help anyone that comes forward and always smiles to
assist one...

and their picture are above this post... haha.. ok, that's me any my best friends.. I dont label them as my best friends, but as my sisters because they have been great friends, assistants and a place to let down all ur feelings, happiness and sadness.. And there will always be someone among the four that will provide good advices in life.. and guess what, these four girls including me will be a teacher after 5 more years...

anywayz, the girls above are me (Jenny), Siti, Gee and Zizi... I appreciate this friendship and may our friendshi bond be as strong and thick as a rope that will never be broken... ~harap2 kita sama2 kena posting kat tempat yg sama ya... haha...~

Sick~

Gosh, I am sick for these few days... Ok, maybe its because of my own wrongdoing as in taking too much keropok during da holidays, frequently out for outing during those reli hot days and much more... and da worse thing is am coughing...

do u know how suffering isit when u have a cough and ur getting sore throat and then realisng that ur voice is goin to disappear as in any time?? haha.. that is the stuffs that is happening to me... Gosh, i hope i will get well before any big events come to me.. or else, there is no time for me to actually recover as soon as possible...

though mock exam has passed but there is more to come and i cant say anything about these hectic schedule.. its like u can barely take a deep breath in this few months... but the great thing is that i am goin home early on may... hopefully there wont be any changes again...

For those who read m blog, plz pray that I will get well soon ya and that all the things that i have to go through throughout this month, may it goes smoothly like what has planned for me...

Jenny~

Follow ur heart~

Billy loved Katie with all his heart. But he never told a Single soul. Katie secretly loved him too. But she thought she would never have a chance with him. Billy asked his friends what they think of her and his friends thought she was gay. They didn't like her at all. So Billy just went along with them. They all made fun of her and made her feel really bad. Katie was so upset.

One day they followed her home from school making fun of her the whole way home. Once she got inside her house she dropped to the floor cringe. She had a crush on Billy since 3rd grade. She didn't know what to do. When Billy got home he felt real bad about what he had done. So he decided to go to Katie's house to tell her he was sorry and that he really loves her.

When he got there he knocked on the door no one answered.

The door was open so he walked in. He walked into the living room and found Katie lying dead on the floor. She had slit her wrists. Billy was so up set . He knew it was his fault she killed her self. And now he could never tell her how he really felt.

The lesson of this story is: Don't wait to until the last minute to tell someone how you really feel. Because it just might be too late. And don't always go by what your friends say, follow your heart.

Thought that it would be great to include this story in my blog...

Jenny~

Monday~

I never like Mondays... I mean who likes Mondays as it is right after Sunday, a day where ppl actually relax and do shopping or stuffs they like... Plus, today was the first day of class after a week of holiday...

Ok, for those who wnet back to their hometown, i guess u guys have a lot of fun with ur family and friends... But for those who didnt went home, (in this case, me, gee and siti), we got lots of works to do...

Went back to class, and everyone looks almost the same as in before they went home... however, some look plump, (ok, in this case, ME!!!!!)... haha... some came back sick, coughing and feeling not well... well, to them, get well soon... =)

Then, we started our class like normal.. But the funny thing is that i can see everyone is nervous whenever the lecturer started to talk on our mock exam and how "bad' the results are.. I mean, of course I am worry of my results too but if this is what i can or manage to achieve, then i cant complain anymore... I cant turn back the time and re-domy exam again, right?

Next, we practised on our play, "Macbeth"... Ok, as the narrator, i did not have a very big role in the practice so i managed to make origami stars while i was behind the curtains... haha... I mean, its better to fill my time with something than juz look at the practices, right? Then, the director told us how hectic our schedule will be as we are getting closer to the day where we perform... OMG~ April shud be a fun month (as in for me, coz im gonna celebrate my bday...), but turns out to be a month where i dont think we have enough time to even breathe...

well, hopefully everything will turn out right and goes smoothly. *fingers-crossed*

Jenny~

holidays comin to an end~~

Holidays coming to an end.. Yeah, i did realised it and i cant imagine that it is that fast,.. I mean human being are always like this.. when they are given holidays, they will complain that its too long, nothin to do and boring.... but when holidays are almost over, they will say that the holiday is too short and the thought of goin back to classes is so frustrating..

i mean, human including me loves to complain... dont u think so?? Come on, ur a human and u cannot say that u never complain.... i mean who dont? even da slightest thing u did, ppl will complain this and that... wat can u do? BEAR WITH IT~

Like wat i say, we are not perfect... we owes think we are perfect and that we wanna be a "perfectionist" kind of thingy when we ourselves dont even look perfect... so wat is ur right to say that u want this and that to be perfect and acts like a perfectionist.... i mean being a little is ok but too much is way over da limits...

So to ppl that is reading tis blog, im not referring to anyone but if u think u felt da impact, den PLZ CHANGE.... no use of being a perfectionist when u urself is not looking at ur own weaknesses first....

Jenny~

finally~

Wow, after trying to edit n paste stuffs in tis blog, finally i got da blog tat i wanted so much... haha... anywayz, lets c wat shud i blog for today...

U noe staying in da past is so not good, but ppl tends to remain in da past... when they say they have let go wat happened in da past, actually they are still remembering it.. funny? human are always like tat,.. i myself am a human and yeah, i admit, i cant let go of da past tat easily...

it seems it has tat kind of impact in my life tat cannot be removed... sometimes, i juz think why cant i have normal life like all my other friends... free to fall for someone, havin friends tat dont actually put hugh expectations on u and stuffs like tat.... EXCUSE ME, im not perfect.... tats wat i wanna stress here....

next, it seems like da word L.O.V.E. is a word tat i can find thru movies, drama and my friends... as in i LOVE movies, dramas and my friends.... but when they say LOVE TO SOMEONE SPECIAL, my answer is "na-ah".... i mean wats da point falling for someone who dont even noe u, look at u or juz treats u like a friend, sister or PILLOW??!!

finally, friendship is something tat i treasure da most... wit da presemce of my close friends, i guess i can still live on this life... WHO NEEDS BOYFRIEND WHEN U HAVE GOD, FAMILY AND FRIENDS??

~Jenny